Thursday, September 30, 2004

Crack kills, but hazing saves

Granted, after a 100 loss season, not much interesting news comes from the Kansas City Royals section of the paper, but Cleveland Indians pitcher Kyle Denny has helped put them back into the headlines.

While leaving the game, a local nare-do-well opened fire on the Indians bus. The bullet went through the pants of another player and hit Denny in his calf. Luckily, because athletes never seem to mature, Denny was wearing white cheerleader boots as part of the hazing rituals of the Indians. This is the same team that was quick to embrace the Japanese pitcher who did some gay pornography to help pay the bills in College. Some might think something fishy is going on with the pitching staff of the Indians, and maybe the associated catching staff as well, but the real shocker to me was that people in the MLB still haze people.

Sure, make the rooks shag some balls, or pick up the tab on some dinners, but making them wear women's clothing? Did you give him a wedgie too? Get Kayelin Perry involved, he can shave his initials in the back of their heads. I can just imagine the dialog:

Coco Crisp says: "Dude, lets make him carry the bats. It would be funnier than my name."
C.C. Sabathia says: "Ha ha. You are so right. That joke never gets old."
Coco Crisp says: "Ha ha. So true."
Omar Visquel says:"iasdfuhufuasyd9awyu974 doas asud aiwoy9wqr y9379 dhusahdkahi."
C.C. Sabathia says: "What the hell is he saying now?"
Coco Crisp says: "Probably telling that story about how when he was a rookie Langston made him dress up like a girl and stand outside the stadium. He tells that story more than Kevin Smith tells that stupid Chasing Amy story."
C.C. Sabathia says:"Hey, that's not a bad idea. Denny, get over here."

Seriously, these guys are in their late twenties or older. Do they really have time for these antics with all the performance enhancing drugs and women they need to deal with in there everyday lives?

Posted at 3:39 PM by ack :: 0 comments

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