Tuesday, September 7, 2004

You aren't going to go out looking like that?

Do you remember Wimbledon so many years ago? The thought of Agassi rolling in with his denim shorts, Bolton-esque coif and neon shirts was enough to make tennis purists drop there monocles in shock. When Evonne Goolagong wore her pure white spandex outfit, they almost stopped serving strawberries and cream.

Fast forward to this year's US Open. Sure, tennis fashion has become more of a big deal since the likes of Anna, Roddick and other young stars have become A-list celebs, but what the hell is happening now? I don't mean to be critical, but Serena William's new Nike outfits are one step above the fashion protocol for woman of the night. Her go-go boots (sorry Serena, we at herohill aren't buying the fact you were those things to support your calves, just like people don't wear push-up bras to support other areas of their body) and sequined outfits were last seen on Divine Brown right before Hugh Grant picked her up to see if his charmingly befuddled antics would make even a prostitute's heart melt. Is this the image Nike really needs to pimp? Dress like a whore, it will make you hit tennis balls harder?

Doesn't this totally combat the commercials they have made showing little girls smoking balls at their dreamy tennis instructor to show they are more then fragile little girls? It also doesn't help that Serena is bigger than most men, and wearing barely enough clothes to cover an Olsen twin. Most people haven't seen that much bust since they walked through Canton. So Serena, here is the cyber mirror you obviously haven't looked into lately - "Put that sh&t away and wear something that doesn't look like a discard from a 2-live crew video".

Posted at 1:08 PM by ack :: 0 comments

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