Monday, April 2, 2007

News:: Baseball Is Back

At one time, Herohill's place of residence was Toronto, so we were able to take in a string of Bluejays home openers live and in person. I, of course, root for the Bluebirds, while Ack is a Rangers fan for some reason. Regardless, we still took in quite a few Jays games together during our time in Toronto. Nothing says spring is here like the special lady in the wheelchair behind you screaming "GO ROY!" at ear-splitting levels.

Well, unluckily for Toronto, the hill doesn't live there anymore, so we can't attend the opener anymore. The Star must know this, so they provided us with a little something to cheer us up. It's this list of the Jays opening day roster, which also doubles as the whitest list of Karaoke songs ever. This is a fantastic article, and I encourage you to check it out on your own, but I shall run down some highlights for you just the same.

- Aaron Hill kicks things off with his choice:

"Can't Fight this Feeling," REO Speedwagon. "Great tune but you don't want me singing it."

Ahh, I wouldn't want anyone singing it Aaron. I feel I should mention Hill is 27. And chose REO Speedwagon. I don't think is was an ironic selection.

- Lyle Overbay sashays in for his selection:

"I'm Too Sexy. I could throw a little dance in, too."

Is he being ironic? Hard to say.

- Royce Clayton's selection of Bob Marley's 3 Little Birds, and Alex Rios' choice of some crazy Reggaeton song are the funkiest choices on the list. I've seen more funk in the CD selection at Costco.

- Frank Thomas hurts us with this:

"Oh, man. I guess Eye of The Tiger, the Rocky III theme song. I know a few of the words but I'll do air guitar and keep humming."

Not only one of the whitest selections on the list, but I'm not sure if Frank is familiar with how Karaoke works. It isn't American Idol, they show you the words to the song you're singing.

- The list contains each players' town of birth, and Matt Stairs takes the opportunity to tell Saint John, NB to suck it:

Born Feb. 27, 1968 in Saint John, N.B.  "I was there for about two minutes; I'm a Fredericton boy."

Matt also lives in Bangor Maine. If you've ever been to Bangor, Maine, you know why Matt chooses to live there over Fredericton. Wait, on second thought, I have no idea why he would want to live in Bangor, Maine.

- Vernon Wells III selects Ice Ice Baby. Will dissing Vanilla Ice ever cease to be funny? My money is on no.

- Reed Johnson goes deep underground for his pick:

"I don't know if he'd have this in his book (meaning, the guy running the karaoke machine) but something from an Orange County band called Sublime. Probably 'No Doubt.'"

Who is this Sublime you speak of? Anyone ever heard of this band outside of Orange County?

- Jason Phillips also selects Ice Ice Baby. Who the ass is Jason Phillips? (Props to Nic-Nic!)

- Roy Halladay's full name is Harry Leroy Halladay. Somehow I don't picture him winning the Cy Young if his name was Harry Halladay. But Leroy Halladay? That is a solid name.

- Victor Zambrano comes with perhaps the best answer of the bunch:

"Not today, I'm sorry."


Needless to say, the pregame music in the Jays clubhouse must be a painful experience. Hopefully the Jays will make sweeter music on the field this year, although I will still be surprised if they get into the playoffs. Pleasantly surprised, but surprised none the less. Anyway, lets play ball.

Posted at 3:00 PM by naedoo :: 0 comments

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